Advice for the Poor: Getting into College

Here is my first post to my series of "Advice for the Poor". I am basing most of this information on experience. Also, I do not touch on every process involved with getting into college (e.g. interviews, visits, recommendations, etc.), but I give some of the basic advice with detail in areas where you can save money.

Here is a summary of the financial advice if you want the good stuff without sifting through the paragraphs below. 2 SAT Tests, 2 SAT Subject Tests, and 4 application fee waivers are available to anyone that qualifies for free or reduced lunches. Look at ANY college that interests you. Financial aid is available everywhere (especially seemingly expensive private schools). I expand on the rest of the college preparation process with the rest of this post, and an outline is directly below:

1. Work hard
2. Find passion
3. List of colleges (no limits!)
4. SAT
5. SAT Subject Tests
6. Applications
7. Financial Aid

1. My first bit of advice is to work hard and get the best grades you can in the most difficult classes you can handle. It is the most obvious and important advice for anyone looking to go to college. Grades and your strength of schedule will be a major factor in the application process.

2. I will talk a lot about standardized tests, but something that is often overlooked is finding something outside of school that you are passionate about. Many people think you have to be involved with a lot of different activities and clubs for your college application, but that is not true. In fact, many people try overloading themselves like that and either cannot handle it or get very little out of their experiences. I suggest finding one major activity. It could be a sport, a club, an instrument, an organization, or even your own project. Find something you love and pour your heart into it. The results will be great for you and your application, and money is not required just diligence.

3. The first 2 points were to work hard in school and find a passion. Those are 2 things you should get started on early in high school or even in middle school. In the next paragraph, I will begin talking about standardized tests, but at around the same time you are starting to think about the SAT (10th grade), you should also be making an initial list of colleges that interest you. DO NOT WORRY ABOUT HOW MUCH THEY COST!!!! It does not matter how much a college costs because financial aid is available to you. Private schools that appear more expensive typically have more funds available for financial aid, so although they appear more expensive, they are actually cheaper than public schools are financial aid is applied.

It is possible that you will be required to pay nothing for school, but if financial aid does not cover everything, then there are very good government loans available to students with need. This initial list can be very big if you want (aim for 10-25 schools with a range of selectivity), but by the time you apply for schools, you probably want to narrow it down to 4 to 12 schools.

4. Now, let's get to the big standardized tests. These will be another major factor. Make sure to take the PSAT in 10th grade. Do not be discouraged by these results. It is almost certain that your actual SAT scores will be higher than these results. After you get these results, you can start studying the format of the SAT and taking practice tests. There are plenty of special courses you can sign up for to get 'professional' help and practice, but most of these will be out of your price range. I would advise you to buy a relatively new SAT book (generally the more practice exams the better). This book should cost somewhere between $10 and $20, and it is well worth the cost. If you have a good public library and really do not want to spend the money on a book, then you may be able to find a SAT practice book there. Take some time during the summer after 10th grade to study the SAT and take a few practice tests. I would suggest refreshing yourself throughout your junior year by taking just a few hours every month to do some practice problems.

Take the SAT at the end of your junior year if possible. I know you may be concerned about the cost of the test, but guess what? You probably don't have to pay! If you qualify for free or reduce lunches, then you qualify for 2 FREE SAT Tests and 2 FREE SAT Subject Tests! Here is a link to the chart for income eligibility. For example in 2011-12, a family of 4 that makes less than $41k qualifies! Just go to your guidance counselor and ask them about it. If they don't know about it (like mine), then tell them it exists or show them the website personally.

5. Ok, so you are taking challenging classes, getting good grades, found something your passionate about, and are ready for the SAT at the end of your junior year. What else should you be thinking about? Well, it sounds let you are on the right path, but some of the schools you are aiming for may require SAT Subject Tests (especially if you are looking at some very selective schools). Do your research on what is required and which tests would work for you. Remember that you have 2 fee waivers for subject tests (you can take up to 3 subject tests at once, so really this could cover up to 6 subjects! But that shouldn't be necessary).

6. Now, let's say it is the summer of your senior year. It is time to begin applications! Get started early because you do not want to be just starting when you are busy with your senior year. College applications do cost money, BUT you can probably get out of paying anything. First, you have 4 college application fee waivers through the same process as the SAT fee waivers. If you are applying to more than 4 schools, then email colleges asking if they could waive the fee because you may have financial difficulties. This usually works, but they may ask for some paperwork to proof your family's income.

7. Once all the applications are in, then you can sit back and wait. You can begin working on your financial aid. This can be a long process especially if your parents are not familiar with doing their own taxes. It can be done by yourself. You will need to ask your parents for a copy of their tax returns. The rest you can probably figure out online. MAKE SURE TO KEEP UP WITH FINANCIAL AID DEADLINES. The financial aid package will probably be very important to your decision. Getting all the paperwork in on time will insure that you are considered for aid and that you receive your package as soon as possible.

You should have plenty of options with varying costs. Make sure to make a smart financial decision, but you must also use your gut and follow your heart if you have more than one viable option. The school for you is not necessarily the cheapest one.

I hope this was helpful! Let me know if you have any questions.

Society Scaring Men from Women?

I thought of this theory of why men have difficulty talking to women. I have read several articles over the past few years about how men are not being 'men' anymore. They are not getting married and settling down. There seems to be a disconnect between males and females. I do not really believe my theory, but since I have not heard it anywhere before, I am going to claim it as my own.

The primary resource for my theory is this observation by Bill Burr. He has this bit about how guys can't be around children anymore because of the widespread coverage of men inappropriately touching children. This creates an awkwardness for men whenever children come around because they are afraid someone is going to call them out as being a pedophile for any interaction they have with children. My theory may not be true, but I am convinced this observation is true. It is sooooo sad. The clip is below:



I wonder if there is a similar dynamic that has been created between men and women. There certainly is no end to the stories of men doing terrible things to women. Does this create an awkwardness in men when they are around women they do not know or do not know well. I'm sure these stories of men were not thrown in the face of every man a few decades ago, which may explain the recent change in society.

 If it relates to the Bill Burr bit, then guys would instantly stop being open, throw their arms up, and say how,  'My hands are up high. I am not aroused' whenever they are around a woman. Haha, this may be an exaggeration, but there seems to be a little truth to it. Guys may feel they cannot flirt with woman because they will be labeled as a jerk, a guy that just wants a one-night stand, or worse!

Ok, there is my theory. Someone go design an experiment and figure out how to test this hypothesis.

Healthy Lunch Meals for Work

PBJ
+2 Whole grain or whole wheat bread is almost essential. Look for at least 3 g of protein and 3 g of fiber PER SLICE (a lot of breads put there serving size as 2 slices, which makes the protein and fiber look higher)
+1 Instead of Jelly pack just a Peanut Butter Sandwich and eat with fruit (banana goes great with Peanut Butter)
+1 All natural peanut butter requires a bit of mixing sometimes because the oil separates, but it is preservative free with no trans fat...but I will admit it is not that much better nutritionally than regular homogenized peanut butter

SANDWICH
+2 Leftover meat (You want to avoid deli and pre-sliced meat as much as possible because it is full of salts and preservatives. Also, lunch meat is linked to various forms of cancer.)
+2 Whole grain or whole wheat bread is almost essential. Look for at least 3 g of protein and 3 g of fiber
+1 CHEESE is always good in moderation


Tuna
I haven't tried this yet, but you could pack a container of tuna or buy the pouches. Eat by itself, on bread, or on bread with CHEESE. Remember not to eat too much tuna because of the mercury. I would suggest no more than twice a week (5-6 ounces/week).
+2 Whole grain or whole wheat bread is almost essential. Look for at least 3 g of protein and 3 g of fiber PER SLICE (a lot of breads put there serving size as 2 slices, which makes the protein and fiber look higher)
+1 CHEESE is always good in moderation

Hard-Boiled Eggs
I have also not tried this one, but very easy in concept. I'm not sure what else to eat with it. Maybe bread? I also eat too many eggs already, so I would prefer to keep eggs to breakfast.
+2 Whole grain or whole wheat bread is almost essential. Look for at least 3 g of protein and 3 g of fiber PER SLICE (a lot of breads put there serving size as 2 slices, which makes the protein and fiber look higher)

SNACKS

• NUTS (any nuts...I like pistachios, almonds, and soybeans)
• YOGURT
• +1 Greek yogurt (double the protein, but roughly double the price)
• FRUIT (any fruit...I like bananas, apples, oranges, and raisins)
• VEGETABLES (any vegetable...I have only gotten into baby carrots so far)
• +1 Add Peanut Butter onto CELERY 
• MILK (yes, one day I will pack a small jug of milk)
• PROTEIN/ENERGY BAR (always good to have a meal replacement if you cannot eat)
• TRISCUITS (I love my triscuits)
• +1 Pack some CHEESE to add on top

My Spiritual Journey I

I wanted to highlight some of the resources that have been helpful to me in my spiritual journey. These resources are in no way comprehensive. There were many factors that influenced me. Many of which I am aware and probably even more that I do not even realize. My main reason for wanting to write this post is for myself, but it would also be awesome if this post encourages others or helps others to find answers to their spiritual or religious questions.

I started with reading Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis. Many of my questions about Christianity and simply believing in God were answered after reading Mere Christianity, but it didn't shift my beliefs. It did encourage me to keep looking.

I began reading a forum based on my personality type of INTP (although I have retaken the test and may be an INTJ). Either way, intpforum.com gave me an insight into the way people that think like me see their spirituality. Most of the people on this forum could be classified as atheist, but there are also a significant number of people that consider themselves to be Christians, which was surprising to me. A large factor that led to everything 'clicking' in my head was one specific thread.

In this thread, members were very honest with their faith. There was also a very rational argument made for and against Christianity. I think many of the arguments in this thread are unique. I would like to emphasize this point because many people claim to make rational arguments for Christianity, but most of these points are recycled lines of reasoning that non-believers have heard before. For example, the something from nothing question. Having faith certainly helps me answer that question, but I know that this argument will not persuade too many non-believers. (Actually, I think this is an interesting question for non-believers to wrestle with, but I encourage believers to not push the answer. It is very difficult to come to the conclusion of a Creator if you have never considered the argument. Also, it is very difficult for me to believe something that goes against my beliefs. I immediately collect all the evidence contrary to your point just as a reaction, which prevents me from actually figuring it out on my own. Maybe ask the question, present your argument and maybe even the atheist/agnostic argument fairly and let them figure it out. You can mention what you believe, but I do not think that is helpful unless they are really pushing you for your opinion.)  Logically, we do not know how everything came into existence. If you cannot determine a solution by reason, then does that mean you should guess?!? Everything may have just happened from some weird anomaly we do not understand. Maybe this matter has always been here and our concept of time is preventing us from accepting this. Maybe a higher entity created everything. Maybe it was the ole Flying Spaghetti Monster! I often feel believers will ask this question to non-believers as if the only possible answer is God, or as if it is a fill-in-the-blank question and the only thing that seems to make sense is God (and it sure is optimistic, right?). I feel it is perfectly acceptable logically to just leave it blank. We do not know.

There is a place for logic and reasoning in coming to faith, but logic alone will not bring someone to believe. A large part of this thread is made up of Christians arguing that strict logic is inadequate for answering these important questions. I know that sounds ridiculous to many people, but it is explained much more eloquently in that thread I linked earlier if you are curious.

Many people, including myself, tend to believe that agnosticism is the only logical belief because you cannot prove God does or does not exist. I struggled with many of my doubts for more than 2 months while using intpforum.org to read how like-minded individuals have thought through similar questions. One night, mentally exhausted, I was talking to a friend. I had been spending hours each day looking for answers to all my questions, and it was not helping me. My friend had told me many times before that I could not find the answer to all my questions, or my friend would ask, 'if I did have all the information, would that make a difference'. I always dismissed these statements because it seemed obvious that I had to understand everything really well for me to make such a drastic decision in my life. I felt I could not simply ignore them and pretend to believe.

Well, my friend told me again something along those lines when she noticed how exhausted I was that night. At that moment, I remembered that similar line of reasoning from that thread. It was basically the same idea. Here is the exact post I went to:

By entering the fray of experience you will grow. You may decide by the end of all your experience that you are still an atheist, but you will be a far wiser atheist. For example, in India we found ourselves in a small town up in the middle of the Himalayas. People dressed in bright yellow scarves and saris were pouring down the street all headed in one direction. Some people approached us and asked if we would visit their temple and join in a banquet. We found out later that they were Sikhs and that hospitality is central to their religion. So we went to the temple to be greeted by everyone and were freely offered food and drink.

Now I didn't become a sikh but it made me warm towards them and open to their ways. I look back now and feel they have a way to God that is different to Christianity but in some ways similar - the emphasis on giving and welcoming and loving your neighbour. Experience makes things more complex and makes the experiencer more open and flexible. Less resistant and closed. Of course, I believe that in exploring a faith you will find God - how, when, which religion etc is none of my business.

But you won't find God going round and round and round and round in your head. Some change has to enter the system from somewhere, otherwise you'll be having the same thoughts in 10 years time that you're having today - scary thought.

Its the same point I made back a few posts about leadership. If no-one takes a stand, nothing will change and the situation will be the same for younger people growing up in ten years time as it is today.

The problem is that there is nothing that anyone can say that will influence your thoughts and feelings about God/god. Only you can do that and that's if you want to. If you don't want to, well, I suppose it's back to reading Richard Dawkins! If you do want to, you have to do something different today than you did yesterday - otherwise you'll be stuck in the same old constructs year after year.

Still, you may prefer it like that.


Something changed that night. I decided that I had learned enough and struggled with enough of my doubts. I had to open myself up to believing. From that point, I felt I could believe in God. I felt at peace with my thoughts for awhile, but I soon realized that understanding Christianity and developing my relationship with Christ was not going to be easy. So far, I have found that it is challenging, but nowhere near as emotionally draining as this process I just explained. I have had doubts since then, but I have been falling back to my faith and relationship with God. I wanted to get into some of the more recent books and sites that have been helpful to me, but that will have to wait until another post.